February 26

[On February 26, 1810, while living as a retired private citizen at Monticello, I wrote this extraordinarily candid letter to General Thaddeus Kosciuszko, my beloved revolutionary brother-in-arms and trusted friend. Set against the historical backdrop of my recent departure from the presidency, an exit I had hoped would mark a peaceful return to a quiet agrarian life, I initially detailed a pristine daily routine of farming, reading, and tutoring local youth on the principles of legitimate government. However, the true nature of this correspondence shifts dramatically as I confessed that my total absorption in public affairs left my private finances completely ruined, culminating in an unexpected ten to twelve thousand dollar debt upon leaving Washington. I secretly intercepted forty-five hundred dollars of Kosciuszko's own American investment capital to stave off my immediate bankruptcy, an agonizing choice that plunged my mind into a painful emotional thraldom and forced me to beg my old friend for his silent forgiveness and approbation.]

I am retired to Monticello, where, in the bosom of my family, & surrounded by my books, I enjoy a repose to which I have been long a stranger. My mornings are devoted to correspondence. From breakfast to dinner I am in my shops, my garden, or on horseback among my farms; from dinner to dark I give to society & recreation with my neighbors & friends; & from candlelight to early bed-time I read. My health is perfect; and my strength considerably reinforced by the activity of the course I pursue; perhaps it is as great as usually falls to the lot of near 67 years of age. I talk of ploughs & harrows, seeding & harvesting, with my neighbors, & of politics too, if they chuse, with as little reserve as the rest of my fellow citizens, & feel at length the blessing of being free to say & do what I please, without being responsible for it to any mortal. A part of my occupation, & by no means the least pleasing, is the direction of the studies of such young men as ask it. They place themselves in the neighboring village, and have the use of my library & counsel, & make a part of my society. In advising the course of their reading, I endeavor to keep their attention fixed on the main objects of all science, the freedom & happiness of man. So that coming to bear a share in the councils and government of their country, they will keep ever in view the sole objects of all legitimate government.

From this portion of my personal condition, I must turn to another of unpleasant hue, and apologize to you for what has given me much mortification. For some time before I retired from the government I anxiously endeavored to have all outstanding accounts called in, & no new ones contracted, that I might retire, at least without any embarrasment of debt. Wholly occupied with the care of the public affairs, I was obliged to trust to others for that of my own: and in the last moments of my stay in Washington, notwithstanding my precautions, accounts came in in a mass so overwhelming as to exceed all my resources by ten or twelve thousand Dollars. A friend accomodated me readily with a considerable part of the deficiency, to be reimbursed out of the first proceeds of my estate. While sunk in affliction as to the residue, Mr. Barnes suggested that the public were paying off the whole of the 8. percent stock, that he had not yet recieved yours of that description, or reinvested it in any other form: that he had thought of placing it in bank stock, but, he supposed, if I should pay you an interest equal to the dividends on bank stock, it would be indifferent to you from what hand your profits came: & that the 4500.D. of yours then disengaged, would entirely relieve my remaining deficiency. The proposition was like a beam of light; & I was satisfied that were you on the spot to be consulted the kindness of your heart would be gratified, while recieving punctually the interest for your own subsistence, to let the principal be so disposed of for a time, as to lift a friend out of distress. I therefore gave Mr. Barnes a proper written acknolegement of the debt, & he applied your 8. percent principal to the closing of my affairs. I was the more encouraged to do this, because I knew it was not your intention to call your capital from this country during your life, & that should any accident happen to you, it’s charitable destination, as directed by the paper you left with me, would not be at all delayed. I have set apart an estate of 3000.D. a year which I have at some distance from Monticello, & which is now engaged in reimbursing what was furnished by the friend I alluded to. It will be nearly accomplished by the close of this year. Two more years will suffice for the residue of that, & yours; when this part of your funds can again be invested in some of the monied institutions. The diversion of it from them for 4. or 5. years, will in the mean time have saved me. But the affliction is a sore one, & needs the solace of your approbation.

Instead of the unalloyed happiness of retiring, unembarrased & independent, to the enjoiment of my estate, which is ample for my limited views, I have to pass such a length of time in a thraldom of mind never before known to me. Except for this, my happiness would have been perfect.